Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Things I Hate About Me

Before anything, this is not meant to drive sympathy or support or any of that, this is a personal observation of my own character. I don’t want any comments saying “Oh No, don’t say that about yourself” or “you don’t do xyz” simply because I live with myself more than anyone has lived with me, it’s a matter of self reflection.

If you don’t want to read this then don’t, if you don’t like it, it doesn’t matter. I say this with all the love and respect, but the purpose of this post is just to come to a certain truth with myself about myself, to be able to either fix the things I hate, live with them, or even learn to like them someday. I am not depressed or sad or anything, I’m just doing a long overdue spring cleaning of myself.

Without further ado, I hate:

  1. Lying
  2. Being moody
  3. Making my mom angry
  4. Getting angry in general
  5. Losing tolerance
  6. Trusting the wrong people
  7. NOT trust the right people
  8. Not being there for some people when they need me, sometimes because I don’t stand seeing them in pain, and sometimes because I am just not well enough to carry my friends’ and family’s burdens. In either case, I still hate it
  9. Falling for the wrong guy... over, and over, and over again…
  10. Quitting
  11. Being so unconfident sometimes
  12. Being blunt with words and hurting people; my words get 3D as one of my friends says
  13. Not always standing up for myself when it’s due
  14. Dodging blame
  15. Saying the stupidest things sometimes (not just being blunt, I mean really stupid things)
  16. Being such a coward
  17. Being arrogant
  18. Being materialistic
  19. Being selfish
  20. Being judgmental
  21. Not listening to my heart
  22. Not apologizing sometimes
  23. Not reading the signs
  24. When I get childish
  25. When I try to act all mature and end up feeling really sucky on the inside
  26. Pretending that I’m fine when I’m not
  27. Not being able to make a decision in all the important stuff
  28. Procrastinating
  29. Not doing what I dream about doing
  30. Letting other people put me down
  31. Not listening to my heart

All in all, this took me around 15 minutes to write, Q.E.D. as we used to say in math. Smile

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Saturday, September 1, 2012

Of Lady Moon and Master Sea

OF Lady Moon and Master Sea


Lady Moon came closer to earth tonight. She was flirting with Master Sea. And even though she hid part of her face with the veil of night, she still gave him a shadow of a smile, as she listened to his reverent wooing in the crashing of the waves. She stayed close all night, wondering if her love was worth the destruction of the world, wondering if she was ever to unite with her lover, and wondering how far he would reach for her if she showed him her face and came close enough for him to touch it..


The Lady Moon walked along the sands of the sea shore, not daring have the waves touch her feet. Her white frock flew in the breeze, the night in her hair twinkled with stars that faded in the bright silvery glow of her smile and her grey eyes. She walked with grace only fit for the Lady of the Moon that makes the lonely and dark nights of Master Sea more bearable for all the lost sailors. Tonight, she meets the Master of her heart on the realm of earth, where neither of them belong, not even to each other.


Master Sea stood there with the deafening and continuous drumroll of the waves marking the approach of Lady Moon, giving away the sound of his heartbeats. His skin caught her glow as she curtseyed before him, as if she glowed only for him, and didn't she, tonight? The mighty waves broke at the shore, bowing at the feet of Lady Moon, coming so close but not touching her, for those are the rules of this realm.
"I hope the spray does not bother you, my Lady," he said.
"Nothing of you can ever bother me, Master," she answered.
The dying droplets of Master Sea's essence carried by the lord of wind, who knew of their plight, were the only feel they had of each other. He was the master of the sea, he had the power to drown this realm, kill every creature that lived on earth as he had done once before at the order of the Creator. It is he who shapes this earth and yet, he is powerless to touch his love, and he would destroy the whole realm if only she would let him.
"I am grateful to see you my love. This realm is kind to us to let us meet on its land. We honor its charity," said the Lady in reply to his roaring waves. Master Sea kneeled at her feet, picking the moonstones that were her tears; her gift to him, given at the happiest moment, and in the utmost despair. The stones glowed in his hands then disappeared, for he has placed them in the depth of his soul, to shine her love in the deepest parts of the oceans, where her glow loses reach and the monsters dwell.


They spent the night on the beach, enjoying the closeness, the proximity that they seldom have. But nights must always end, Lady Moon was still glowing when dawn came, but then the sun was running towards them and her glow faded. She became pale as the horizon turned pink, then red, then orange. Master Sea watched her in despair, fading in front of his eyes. She comforted him with the smile of the weary when they run out of words. The sea roared and roared, the waves as high as towers; for the Master was angry, but then they calmed and his anger was only sadness. He had promised her that this night, when they met and talked and laughed, would be a night of peace, that it would always be a night with a clear smiling moon and a calm endless sea. It was a night that inspired poetry in the hearts of men and love in the hearts of women. Now that the sun was up and Master Sea stood alone on the beach with the waveless sea whispering their story, he frowned because for the following nights, he shall see his love only looking away from him when she is at her throne up in the sky, and she will veil her face in the night until one day she will not show it at all. On that painful day, he will tolerate the darkness of his own soul for on the next she will look upon him again, slowly removing her veil, and she will smile at him. One day, he will meet her again, on a night much like the one that just passed, and maybe on that night, someone would tell the story of the love Master Sea has for Lady Moon.


The End!

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